By a young adult working with JoyDew
Masking is a strategy used, consciously or unconsciously, to appear non-autistic or neurotypical. For me, masking was unconscious; I didn’t realize I did it or how much effort it took to maintain. I didn’t know what masking was until I started researching autism and suddenly things in my life started to make sense. I dreaded social interactions, I was exhausted all the time, and I struggled to make and maintain friendships. Learning about masking was an “aha!” moment for me. I began paying attention to my thoughts and feelings when having social interactions and I realized I spent most of the time thinking about how I was supposed to interact. A constant stream of thoughts plagued me, “remember to blink, make sounds so they know you’re listening, don’t talk until it’s your turn, look at them when they’re talking, remember to add inflection so you don’t sound like a robot.”
Masking can be taught or learned; early ABA therapy was based around teaching children to mask their autistic traits. I learned to mask by watching the people around me and visual media (movies, TV). Masking is like camouflage, stemming from a desire to fit in and be unnoticed. Being part of the herd is a safety measure, if you don’t stand out you don’t get singled out.
